I'm sorry about the ad's/Why in an Taco's and Snails cant be friends

If you are one of the few unfortunate people who have read my blog you will have noticed that I have in fact sold out and put ad space. Why have I done this, its simple I'm poor and a sell out. No if your one of my friends (which you most likely are considering no one ever reads a two day old blog) you can verify the whole being poor thing. Though I would now like to consider myself an out of work writer so please adjust all insults accordingly. As for the whole sell out thing, That's all out of a cleverly crafted plan.You see if I start out my budding career as a asshole sellout and gradually get better I will look better. It wont be all "look at that asshole sellout." It will be like "that guy used to be a sellout but now he's pretty cool." I also wish I could control the content of these ad's but again I woefully cannot but I ask of you to do one thing for me, click on those Nurse Jackie ad's and make me a penny even though you like most of America have no Idea what the fuck a Nurse Jackie is.

Now for the important part of the blog, the not begging for money. I deiced that since I did use a portion of the blog begging for money I would delay my original concept of how Twilight is just a super bitched down version of Buffy The Vampire Slayer and instead work on a more absurd less ranty concept, Why if in an alternate detention where all objects have life and a cognitive process a taco and a Snail could never be friends. Lets look at the facts here, the taco would be a very fast moving and impatient creature. Why do I think that? Simple, next time you bite down into a hard shelled taco do it slowly and see what happens, the taco breaks into a million peices leiving you with glorified cheeseless nachos. Because of this fact Taco's would hate moving slow due to a fear of death and a snail could never keep up.

What I believe the taco would look like.

Even if the Taco and snail could get past this (they couldn't) their would still be one major obsticle. A single touch would either kill or seirously injure both parties. Think of a taco shell a hard salty chip like substance, wait salty no if I remember correctly snails dont like salt very much. in fact it kills them. Now think of how slimy a snail is, according to my calculations the slime of the snail on a taco shell would cause the shell to desinigrate like a chip in water spilling its guts everywhere.

She does all my calculations.

In conclusion Tacos and snails could never ever form a lasting bond but on a happier note Snails and pickles would be very happy together as would Tacos and Ferrets. Remember to click an ad for me and until next time I'm a corporate sellout and you aren't.